What do you do when your daughter comes home with a paper from the father daughter dance? Well, a lot of you may just go out and buy your little girl a dress and tell your husband what you think he should wear. What if you don't have a husband or boyfriend? I was faced with that decision twice.
The first time my daughter brought a paper home for a father daughter dance was when she was in Kindergarten. She came home all smiles and so excited to go! At the time, I was in a same-sex relationship. I wasn't really sure what to do. Here my child was all excited to go to a dance, but there was no father around to take her. I didn't want her to miss out because of something that was out of her control. I ended up taking her myself! She had so much fun that night. She clung next to me the entire time. I knew I made the right decision.
Fast forward to the fifth grade. My daughter was 10 years old now. She came home with another paper for a father daughter dance. This time she wasn't smiling. She looked kind of sad and just handed it to me while saying, "I know I can't go."
I went to Facebook for feedback from friends. I found that there was quite a few mothers who also faced this problem. On one hand, I knew kids her age are sometimes cruel and may say something that may hurt my daughter's feelings. On the other hand, I wanted to take her so she could enjoy the dance just like her other classmates.
At first, I was going to have my brother or a close friend take her. But I thought about it. Ive literally been her mother and father figure pretty much her whole life. I decided that I was going to take her!
When I told her the news, she was excited! We both went shopping for dresses and the night of, I put beautiful curls in my daughter's hair and put some light makeup on her. She was so happy in that moment and the rest of the night.
The dance was awesome! It was a lot different from when she was in kindergarten. Most of the time she ran off with friends to dance and I was amazed at just how many friends she had! I swear I was introduced to at least 20 or so kids that night! Not once did any child ask why her father wasn't there or why I was there instead of her father. And I noticed I wasn't the only mother there. There were a few of us there! My child danced and danced and danced. She was having a blast! I was so glad that I took her.
To single mothers, whose daughters don't have a father in their life, when they bring home that paper that you may dread and they look at you and say, "I know I can't go." Take the paper from them and say, "Oh yes you can." Take her to the dance. I promise you won't regret it and it's something she will later look back on and cherish. You are a mother and a father. You bust your ass alone to give this child everything they need. You have every right to be there. I see you. I am you. Keep fighting and keep raising beautiful humans!
Comments
Post a Comment